A TRUE STORY (2)................
December 21st 2006 09:51
Last June, no wait maybe it was July. Either way, thanks to the ATO, I was more cashed up than a divorce lawyer in a room full of Beatles.
So I hit the local pub scene with the sole purpose of getting laid.
Wasn’t after a conversation.
Wasn’t after a second helping.
And definitely wasn’t after breakfast.
Anyhoo, I hook up with this maddy named Veronica Stetson. But to protect her identity let’s call her Back Alley Sally (BAS). BAS is clearly out on the chase also and is more than good to go which is a huge bonus cos I really couldn’t be bothered getting her and me all lagered up for the event.
Bless her heart BAS was as keen as she was mad and we soon found ourselves in the back of my mate's work van where she exploded quicker than you can say North Korea. About twenty or so minutes in though things start taking a ‘turn’.
“I wanna whip you”, BAS screams.
“WHAT!?!?”, I reply suddenly frightened.
“I wanna whip you. It really gets me off”, she yells.
And with that she rips off the radio antenna from my mate's van and starts whacking my arse like there is no tomorrow.
Well there was a tomorrow.
And my arse looked like bok choy.
Two weeks later I still couldn’t sit down so I went to see a doctor.
No sooner had I dropped my strides then the Doc just gasped in horror.
“Is it bad Doc?” I whimpered.
“Bad?”, says the Doc, “This is the worse case of van aerial disease I’ve ever seen!”
So I hit the local pub scene with the sole purpose of getting laid.
Wasn’t after a conversation.
Wasn’t after a second helping.
And definitely wasn’t after breakfast.
Anyhoo, I hook up with this maddy named Veronica Stetson. But to protect her identity let’s call her Back Alley Sally (BAS). BAS is clearly out on the chase also and is more than good to go which is a huge bonus cos I really couldn’t be bothered getting her and me all lagered up for the event.
Bless her heart BAS was as keen as she was mad and we soon found ourselves in the back of my mate's work van where she exploded quicker than you can say North Korea. About twenty or so minutes in though things start taking a ‘turn’.
“I wanna whip you”, BAS screams.
“WHAT!?!?”, I reply suddenly frightened.
“I wanna whip you. It really gets me off”, she yells.
And with that she rips off the radio antenna from my mate's van and starts whacking my arse like there is no tomorrow.
Well there was a tomorrow.
And my arse looked like bok choy.
Two weeks later I still couldn’t sit down so I went to see a doctor.
No sooner had I dropped my strides then the Doc just gasped in horror.
“Is it bad Doc?” I whimpered.
“Bad?”, says the Doc, “This is the worse case of van aerial disease I’ve ever seen!”
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Comment by pegasus
Poker Addict
Comment by mandy
Comment by K.L. Almeroth
Motherhood
Oh, yeah.
You kind of deserved this van aerial ass whipping...
K.L.
Comment by Lilla
Enviro Warrior
An Extra Ordinary Life
Dream Herald
*tears*
*holding my sides*
*more tears*